Tuesday 26 December 2017

Pub 152, Day 56 – Hen & Chickens

By Rob

We’d been to some rough pubs. We’d been to boozers that we didn’t want to step inside, that we couldn’t wait to leave, and that made us re-evaluate the necessity and sense of visiting every pub in the city.

But the rules, however self-imposed, were clear. Nowhere was off-limits. All before us must be conquered. And so it was that we found ourselves visiting one of the places we’d managed to avoid thus far. We were fast running out of pubs in the city centre, and could put it off no longer.

The Hen & Chickens, which each of us had passed previously on the bus, had always looked particularly terrifying – even from the safety of a moving vehicle. Situated halfway down a narrow, dark alleyway in one of the less salubrious parts of the city centre, with an ever-present group of blokes standing outside the entrance, the visuals alone would be enough to dissuade most.

Its reputation matched the aesthetic. Ever since the notorious Cannon (across the road) had closed its doors, the Hen & Chickens had become known as the go-to spot for picking up things that had toppled from the back of HGVs. On our way over from the Old Queens Head, we had a quick scan of the Sheffield forums for any mention of the pub. Here are some personal favourites, quoted verbatim:

The market leading watering hole for chav scum since the demise of the Cannon”.

Noticed more than the usual swarm of repellent pondlife in the area.”

There is no way I would venture down that alley, even if I had a death wish.”

There's literally a police car parked outside on Street View.”

It looks as rough as arseholes.”

They don't take card. Apart from that it's okay.”

A mixed bag, I think you’ll agree.

Naturally, we were bricking it. Our only hope was that, as it was Boxing Day, the festive cheer would soften some of the harder characters. I was also a little unsure as to whether this was, really, the best place to take my younger sister for a Christmas drink. But then again, she’d recently purchased a pretty impressive gaming PC and, should she meet her demise, I stood to inherit.

We arrived at the top of the alleyway, administered last rites, and walked towards the pub. There were a few blokes outside smoking, but they largely ignored us as we slipped through the doors. Inside, it looked exactly as we’d imagined. The music was blaring, disco lights were flashing, and the somewhat shabby taproom was decorated with large, inflatable Santas and snowmen. A few people were sat at the other end of the room, and a couple of women were flinging themselves around on the dancefloor – clearly pissed and enjoying the holidays (as they ought to).

At the bar, we were deeply unsurprised to discover no guest ales. As expected, we were faced with a challenging beer choice. Could this, finally, be the time we had to repeat a pint? Would pub 152 be where the bonus challenge ended?

Not a chance.

We each ordered a bottle of Magners Original Apple cider, which we’d somehow managed to avoid thus far. Neither of us could believe we hadn’t already ticked this one off, but a quick scan of the list showed we were safe.

We sat ourselves down on some stools and, within minutes, a couple of regulars staggered over and started making conversation. Unlike our dodgy encounter in the Hollin Bush, the clientele of the Hen & Chickens were especially friendly (in a decidedly non-scary way). The atmosphere was, indeed, one of drunken festivity and, to our great relief, nobody tried selling us a job lot of Gillette razors. Despite the pub’s fearsome reputation, we had a perfectly nice time there – although we didn’t hang around after our one drink, just in case the situation changed.

While the Hen & Chickens still definitely looks like a ropey establishment, and while I imagine it still has its moments, we can only rate the pub on the experience we had. Unfortunately for them, that still only gets a 4.

Yes, we were pleasantly surprised by the reception we received, but you don’t get extra points for not hosting a stabbing. Meanwhile, the interior and range of beers were both notably subpar.

Pub: Hen & Chickens (3 Castle Green, S3 8LX)
Rating: 4/10

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